A Lesbo Look at the Pookieograph

Surprisingly, none of my many lurking readers poured out their inner most thoughts on the vaginal photoplethysmograph, known here as the “pookieograph.”

So, my work has taken me deep into the world of the sexual researcher.

While I had visions of clips on —- s, my research revealed that the pookieograph is a “probe” the size and shape of a tampon that contains an LED light and a light detector. When a woman is sexually aroused, blood rushes to the walls of her pookie and they become darker.  So, darker pookie walls reflect more light back to the light detector.  

Apparently there is also a “A New Instrument for Assessing Genital Hemodynamic Changes in Women.”   It’s called the labial photoplethysmograph.   We’ll save that for some other time.  Okay?

Mary Roach is a sex researcher who has written a book, Bonk: The Curious Coupling of Science and Sex.  Roach refers to the pookieograph as “Cinderella’s tampon,” described as an LED and some wiring encased in a round-tipped, bullet-shaped piece of clear acrylic with computer cables dangling.    Mary has tried the pookieograph and reports that she felt as if a bike chain/lock was flowing from her loins.  

Just Hang Around Here Until I Get You Home

Roach has also written on the love lives of Danish hog farmers, the best of whom can bring their hogs to orgasim after insemination.   PS – This is why you should refrain from the dating of farm breeding technitions.

. . .

My research also revealed that women are more easily distracted during sex.   Alfred Kinsey*  wrote in his 1953 book Sexual Behavior in the Human Female , “Cheese crumbs spread in front of a copulating pair of rats may distract the female, but not the male.” 

. . .

Sounds as if we need to keep our sheets free of crumbs. 

A crumb for further thought . . .

“My wife wants sex in the back of the car and she wants me to drive.”
—Rodney Dangerfield