Posts Tagged ‘good dyke porn’

So what does a soccer mom do when she can’t find the solution to a problem? She talks to friends, blogs to strangers, and searches the Internet. In the course of my searching I have found a website claiming to offer “real, amateur, lesbian, bisexual, transgender, queer sex captured on video by Bren Ryder and other incredible members of Team Good Dyke Porn.”

I have to admit, I have not checked out the site (I haven’t had breakfast) and probably will not do so. On the other hand, I checked out a photo of Bren Ryder and she’s kinda cute in a boyish, mannish – could maybe have sex one time but could never introduce her to my friends sort of way. What do you think?

 I think that this is Bren Ryder

Here is what one reviewer said about Bren’s website: “Well, the name says it all really. Did you ever watch something so hot and exciting that you didn’t have words for it? Yep, that’s where I am right now. Well, that and totally smitten with Bren Ryder, the super sexy butch mastermind behind this collection of real dykes really getting off by . . . and any other way you can imagine. And it’s all safe sex! Actually, better than that, it’s safe sex with black latex gloves! How hot is that!?” (This isn’t meant to be an adult site so I took out the nifty description – don’t want any children learning more than I know.)

Okay, well that’s probably not for us. We’re more the sneak a couple of Playboy and Playgirl magazines into the house type of women.

In fact, I can’t imagine ever wearing black latex gloves; although they do sound like a nice accessory for evening wear house cleaning . . . do you think we could get the house keeper to wear them? 

 

Note for Frig - Ask clearning girl to wear these, evening only

Note for Frig - Ask clearning girl to wear these, evening only

We wanted to do a blog together; but as usual we couldn’t agree on the name or what we would write about or the theme for the design.  I suppose that shouldn’t be a surprise since we can’t seem to agree on anything.   “They” say that we aren’t married but if we aren’t, why does it have to feel so much like a marriage complete with ball and chain?

We’re civiled & unionized but bottom line – we’re two lesbos goin at it – over anything and everything.

It’s been 10 years since we met.  What a fun night.   I was working out of town and decided to try out the tiny lesbian neighborhood bar down the street from my hotel.   I noticed her almost as soon as she came in the door.   Everyone seemed to know her.  She was so perky.   Okay, so even though the word “perky” may conjure up dreams of a just-old-enough-to-avoid-jail cheerleader, I can’t say that the dream is far off the mark.   Even from across the room I could tell that joy was pouring out of every inch of her. 

I’m not sure how we managed to be standing side by side at the bar so quickly.   In my memory it seems like she was at the door across the room talking to everyone in the bar and then she was right beside me.   One of those twitch my nose things and zap, there she is.   I’ve had that happen.  A totally different story and totally different girl.  

Okay, you talked me into it.  I’ll tell the other story first. 

The bar was down a dark alley.  The door wasn’t marked.  Only a small light above the door with selective admittance by peep hole invitation.   

Once I’m in, through the smoke and by the light of a bulb hanging over a pool table, I notice a girl (probably straight) with a great butt.  I barely had a chance to think about her and her butt.   Hold on . . . next thing you know she’s dropping her jeans and panties to show me her tattoo that . . .  just happens to be on her butt.  

Wouldn’t I be a great testimonial for that movie “The Secret“? 

The Secret has swept the world and touched millions of lives; mine is one more story of a life transformed into joy.  Learn of the bliss that I have have created in my own life as I share the power behind the law of attraction.  Works on family, friends, pets, health, wealth, and now . . . stranger’s butts.

Anyway . . . that was a weird night.   I’m minding my own business trying to get a sneak peak at a stranger’s butt, that looks quarter bouncing fantabulous, when next thing you know I’m checking out a tattoo on that butt, hearing about Chinese philosophy and the “meaning” of a butt tattoo.  There is “meaning” in a butt tattoo?  Who knew?

I always thought a butt tattoo meant a girl was an easy mark for one out of control sexcapade.   And, please – never more than one night with a girl sporting a butt tattoo.  Even though my mother would never know . . . well, actually my mother would know.  She’s one of those mothers.

Did you know that in Chinese philosophy, “yin and yang are generalized descriptions of the antitheses or mutual correlations in human perceptions of phenomena in the natural world, combining to create a unity of opposites”?   Shocking, the load of crap that one collects from looking at one butt in a smokey peephole alley bar just before closing time.   Thank the good Lord that it was only one night of hearing about the meaning of a butt tattoo.

Well, that was then and I’m in a different place now. 

Back to my original story.  No, this girl didn’t have a butt tattoo.  She hated tattoos and women that went around looking at stranger’s butts and having one night stands.   Instead she was happy, joyful and perky.     So even though we had  . . . 

He’s awake.  Our little man is awake.  I’m hearing a sleepy call for “Mommy” from his room.   “Mommy is on her way, sweetie.”